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Before Mana could reach his destination, Klaha, Gackt, Tetsu and Gaz jumped out in front of him. Mana just stopped walking and gave the three of them an evil glare, and Kozi stopped behind him and stared.
“What are you guys doing here?” asked Kozi, leaning over Mana’s shoulder.
“We have come to…do something!” proclaimed Tetsu, pointing an accusing finger at the two of them. Mana raised an eyebrow as Gackt stepped forward, holding a baby wrapped in a blue blanket.
“Mana!” he yelled, holding the baby up above his head by its feet. “This is our lovechild! Now you must stay with me forever!” Everyone stared in confusion as Gackt swung the baby around over his head. When he got no response from Mana, he lowered his arms to his sides in defeat, the baby swinging down and nearly hitting the floor.
“You might wanna be careful with that baby,” said Tetsu. “It’s a rental.”
“No it isn’t!” yelled Gackt. “This is our lovechild!” Gackt looked desperately at Mana, swinging the baby around by its feet as he spoke. Mana just looked confused and afraid as Gackt walked closer to him. “He was conceived that night…when we were at my place and I watched you play Castlevania for three hours! Do you remember that?! That was the most I’d ever done for you!!!”
“Unfortunately, I do remember that,” said Mana, narrowing his eyes at Gackt. “At least Castlevania was fun.” There was a long silence, with Mana glaring at Gackt, and Gackt still holding the baby upside down.
“SHAKEN BABY SYNDROME!” Klaha yelled suddenly, punching Tetsu in the face for no apparent reason. Tetsu fell to the floor and didn’t get up. Gackt quickly threw the baby aside and jumped onto Gaz, pulling at his hair. Mana and Kozi ran off after Klaha jumped on top of Gackt and knocked him to the floor, punching him in the face. The two of them saw Miyavi and Cossette standing at the door and were about to leave when a giant condom jumped in front of them.
“Hey boys and girls!” said the condom. “I’m here to teach you about safe sex!” Mana and Kozi glanced at each other, then at the giant condom standing before them. The condom started singing and dancing, talking about safe sex all the while. Mana and Kozi just stared in confusion as the giant condom began throwing tubes of lube and boxes of condoms in all directions. Klaha, Gackt and Gaz were still fighting with each other, and Tetsu was still passed out on the floor.
Mana and Kozi slowly crept past the giant singing condom and ran out the door with Miyavi and Cossette, trying to get as far away from the toy store as possible.
“Well, that was random.”
kthnxbai
